My head is killing me. Damn =_=+ Dad asked me to accompany him eat dinner at the new restaurant at the town. But I can't bare my head. I really want to go. Because I'm leaving soon and a moment eating with my Dad won't be happen for a while.

Maybe I'm not good enough in talking. Because everytime I want to express how I feel, it will end up with I'm the one who is at fault. Honestly I always feel guilty to say it sometimes. Because I'm not confident enough. But that doesn't mean you can blame me. I'm a human and I HAVE feelings.

These previous years, I have been believing that being quiet is the best way. But I can't bare to just forget it. It makes me uncomfortable. People around me could sense the uncomfortable in me and said don't be so stiff, just express it. And finally, I got to express how I feel lately. It's good to let it flow from this heart.

But its' not that good in the end. People started to say I'm just thinking about myself. That's not true. Okay, I maybe don't know about your situation. If so, then tell me. Don't just say those things like you don't care. You DO care and mind about it. I want explanation. If you want me to understand you, then make me. Don't just receive it but with an objection in your heart. I'm not saying I don't want to hear about you.

You said you understand about me. Seriously, you ARE NOT~ yet. You want me to understand you and so am I.

I DO care about you. I admit I NEED you. I'm so afraid to lose you. I tried my best to always have you happy be with me. But I just don't feel you are not like that to me.

I know with me writting this, it's just one side feeling. Because I don't know to whom I can tell. I will just write everything here.